38 Then Saul dressed David in his own tunic. He put a coat of
armour on him and a bronze helmet on his head. 39 David fastened on his
sword over the tunic and tried walking around, because he was not used to them.
“I cannot go in these,” he said to Saul, “because I am not used to them.” So he
took them off. 40 Then he took his
staff in his hand, chose five smooth stones from the stream, put them in the
pouch of his shepherd’s bag and, with his sling in his hand, approached the
Philistine.
1 Sam 17:38-40
It is always God and me. I didn't understand how important that was, or why. A dear friend and an
incredible woman of God tried to help me, a young Christian, find a personal
connection with God. Every time I was facing a decision, I came to her for
advice.
»Have you prayed about it?«
she would ask me. No,... I had had my time with God that morning, but this
situation didn't make the list. »Well then go and pray about it first and we'll
talk about it next time,« was her answer, which frustrated me beyond words. And
being the forgetful kind, I heard those words many times.
On one of the occasions, she
added: »It is great that you are open and seek advice, but the decision needs
to be yours, and it is best to make it together with God. I completely believe
He will show you what to do. You will have peace about it, and it will be yours, unique like your signature, and
it will strengthen your relationship with God.«
Now, that didn't help
either, because it was only a description of how it will look like when the
decision is already made. I can't remember well (it was 2002, in Ljubljana,
Slovenia), but I think I started praying about things first, finding some options
and then discussing them to gain 'an outsider's opinion'.
The story of the church in
Ljubljana took a sad turn a few years later; it involved many details, but the
result was, we stopped meeting together. I was in a unique situation, and I
needed to do something. talked to Christians in other cities to get
some insight, consolation, understanding... Nobody could get it just right.
Like David in a suit that was great, but too big for him; like Paul, who was
converted by Jesus himself; like Jesus, who took three disciples with him to
Gethsemane, but they fell asleep. I needed guidance specifically designed for
me and my life.
»Have you prayed about it?« the voice came out of the clutter in my memory. It reminded me that God
and I have been through a lot together; that I do know someone with a perfect
idea, an answer that is just right. I remember I was so grateful for this
voice, that in my mind I went back to this sister and hugged her.
Metaphorically. =)
I ended up connecting with
the nearest church, which was in Zagreb, Croatia; and I am deeply grateful for
the friendships and our times together. I kept living in Ljubljana for 5 years,
and those years were very significant for my Bible study, understanding of my
life with God as an adventure, and making decisions that are a product of this
personal adventure. Now God brought me to Düsseldorf.
- · What does your decision making process look like? Does it involve God?
- · Can you be honest with yourself and with God so that He can console and guide you?
- · Do you believe that you can bring anything before God?
- · ...
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