God-fearing Or Intimidated?

Many times the delicate border between fearing God and just being afraid is unclear to me.

How do I have confidence in Him, and fear Him at the same time?
How do I stay honest with my doubts, but have faith?
I really want you to like me, God! But I'm so... (fill in the gap).

Somehow I think that fearing God shouldn't be such a traumatic experience, for why would He promise us a hopeful future (Jer 29:11-13), and have us live out our lives in discomfort?
Something David once said to the prophet Gad comes to my mind:

David said to Gad, “I am in deep distress. Let us fall into the hands of the Lord, for his mercy is great; but do not let me fall into human hands.”
2 Sam 24:14

God's mercy is much greater and better than mercy of humans.
Often times we take our disappointments from the world and attribute them to God, forgetting that people sin, and God is perfect. The question "Why does God allow this to happen?" gets the best of us, and we can start protecting ourselves from God. This question turns into "Who knows what pill happen if I surrender myself into God's hands, maybe I'll get hurt again."
But what David says is that NOT surrendering to God is much more dangerous.


The context of this thought is a little unpleasant. 2 Sam 24:1-14 gives the account of events.
He had sinned. He had replaced trust in God with statistics (The Message) and had to face consequences. Namely, he needs to choose the punishment: 3 years of famine, 3 months of running from an enemy, or 3 days of plague.
Famine and plague are induced by God directly, pursuit of an enemy is an act of people. Having failed the test of trusting God already, David can see only this difference among the three options. He doesn't even make a specific choice (as to famine or plague), he just tells the prophet that being hunted by men is out. Prophet Gad understands it, and God sends the plague.

Now, see what happens.

So that morning, the Lord sent an angel to spread a horrible disease everywhere in Israel, from Dan to Beersheba. And before it was over, seventy thousand people had died.
When the angel was about to destroy Jerusalem, the Lord felt sorry for all the suffering he had caused and told the angel, “That’s enough! Don’t touch them.” This happened at the threshing place that belonged to Araunah the Jebusite.
2 Sam 24:15-16  (CEV)

"The Lord felt sorry for all the suffering..." It was not that God liked David's choice of punishment. This part is not about David at all. This is all about God's character. Mercy. David counted on it, and he was right. 

Fearing God is not:

• the kind of fear that drives us away from Him, 
• relying on other people and our own devices,
• intimidation by His power and avoiding it,
• fear of having to give up on something because of God and His will.

Fearing God means:

• dislike the emptiness of living without God's guidance,
• consider what will happen if I choose something that isn't God's will,
• beware keeping something God wants me to give up,
• consider what blessing God has in store if I follow.

You get the idea. God has a good plan for us. Don't get intimidated by difficulties of life and people. Let God be your God.

• Is something holding you back from surrendering to God's hands?
• What?
• What is it that "you know better than God"?
• How would your life be different, if you had trusted God at first call? 

Silvija, Duesseldorf